Half Full or Half Empty

  I am starting to notice a new trend with Military wives. I've posted about this a few weeks ago but have started to notice it more and more in the past few days. I am so disappointed in my fellow Military wives! Are there that many of you out there that are viewing the glass half empty? Perhaps I am just running into a lot of angry wives lately. I don't know.

  Why do we feel like we can bash people because they haven't experienced a deployment or being away from a loved one? How can you say "Well he's only going to be gone for X amount of days/weeks! You can't compair that to a deployment or a Field exercises!" I'm sorry to say this, but YES they are allowed to miss their husbands too. Just because our husbands are in (sometimes) dangerous situations doesn't make their time away from home better or worse than another situation. I feel like this can be said for some Military vs. Military wives too. A deployment on the ground can be just the same as a deployment on a ship. What's the difference, really? 

  I'm sad that you wouldn't offer support to your civilian counterpart. I know that when my husbands is deployed I can count on BOTH my Military wife friends and my Civilian wife friends. There's one thing that remains the same, we are all WIVES. We go through some of the same struggles; communication, conflicting schedules, kids, in-laws and I'm sure other things I'm leaving out. Sure there are differences, I'm not saying that there aren't...BUT I am saying, why sing the "Poor me" anthem? We all have our different struggles in life, but I would hope that you can look past the Military vs. Civilian thing, put your big girl panties on, grab your old friends and enjoy the company of Jack, Jim, Jose, Johnnie, and the Captain (because these are the only acceptable men to hang out with when your husbands are gone) and enjoy your half full drinks with all the wives (military or not).

CHEERS!

Deployments and Power Tools

 Every time my husband deploys I find new ways to fill up my days until he returns home. Our first deployment years ago I poured myself into work. I was working 60+ hours a week, volunteering and doing the Sea Turtle walk once a week with one of the other wives. My days were FULL, and it was fabulous to have my days going by so fast with some great distractions! Our next deployment was going to be filled with traveling. We had just gotten to our new duty station a few months before my husband left and my parents had just gotten stationed in Europe. While my husband went on his dessert "vacation" I went on my European getaway. I was gone for 3 1/2 weeks and it was wonderful to explore new cities (and some I'd already fallen in love with). Then when I'd gotten home I realized that "hmm, I was gone a few weeks...and I'm late..." I took a pregnancy test the morning after I got home...positive! My time was now filled with OB/GYN appointments a little bed rest and a lot of trips to Babies 'R Us.

  Now we get to this deployment. I now have a business that I'm growing, a one year old to run after and my newest love...building furniture. I am in love with it and I'm saving so much money by building it myself! How am I doing this you wonder? Ana White...and she is amazing! My first project is the 6 Cube Cubby. I was so happy to find these plans to make it myself and save $200. I like to keep busy when my husband is away and what a better way to do so than to work with my hands and create something fabulous for our home? With the wood, paint, nails and new drill bits my total cost to make this was $52.13! When I first found Ana's website I had a hard time choosing where I wanted to start. There were so many fantastic plans. I hope you have found things you love to keep busy with while your spouse is in the field, TDY or deployed. It really does make the time go by faster and before you know it you'll be showing off your fabulous talents and fun adventures when they get home!

Just about half way here.

Building complete...time to paint!

FINISHED!!!

 

Cabernet and KitchenAid

  I confess, I am in love with with baking. My newest undertaking is ice cream. I recently got the ice cream maker attachment for my KitchenAid mixer. I couldn't wait to get it in the freezer and start making some frozen treats! When we lived in Carmel, CA there was a fabulous French restaurant called Le Normandie; a husband/wife run establishment. If you are ever in the area you should stop in, the food is cooked by Francois and the tables are waited by Christine (both from Normandy, FR). Christine often made a blackberry Cabernet sorbet to go with some of the desserts. As we are sadly no longer on the West coast and able to enjoy Le Normandie I decided I'd try to make my own blackberry Cabernet sorbet. I was so happy with the way it turned out! So here it is for you to try!

You'll need:

2 cups blackberries (fresh or frozen)
1 cup water
1/2 cup sugar
3/4 cup Cabernet Sauvignon
2 tsp lemon juice
1 egg white, whipped

Directions:

Make sure your ice cream maker and/or attachments have been properly frozen.

Whip the egg white until stiff peaks form.

In a blender combine blackberries, water, sugar, wine and lemon juice until smooth.

 Transfer to a bowl and stir in the egg whites; cover and chill for 30 minutes.

Run the mixture in your ice cream maker (check your manual for your models suggested times.) I ran my KitchenAid Ice cream attachment for about 35 minutes.

Transfer your sorbet to a container and place in the freezer to reach your desired consistency and ENJOY!

***I found the recipe at Erika's Sweet Tooth.***

The Military Wife vs The Civilian Wife

   There has been a lot of talk about military wives and civilian wives lately. Personally I think there is a difference between today's military families and civilian families. I however have a different take on the debate over the challenges the wives face. Yes, it's hard to go through a deployment not knowing when your next phone call or letter will arrive. It's hard having our spouses gone (what's seemingly) all the time. It is even harder playing both Mommy and Daddy. Do I think that puts me above my civilian friends who's husbands are gone for business trips and boys weekends? Absolutely not! Of course they miss their husbands when they're gone too. Civilian wives get to see their husbands every night, so when that business trip does come up it's not the norm for them. Just because they have the "9 to 5" job doesn't mean they can't miss them when they're gone and we should support them, because who knows better than a military wife what it's like to spend a Friday night alone and missing your other half?!?

   I know a lot of military wives are thinking "who is this jack wagon" right about now. Some of you are thinking that there is no comparing a field exercise or deployment to a business trip or guys weekend. For the most part the civilian wives aren't trying to offend you by saying, "I know what you're going through." They're trying to show you support, trying to relate as best they can. Of course there are days that you don't want to hear a one week business trip compared to a 7 or 12 month deployment. Before you strangle these women remember that they are just like you. They love their husbands, they miss their husbands too. If you say you don't miss your husband when he's in the field for a week then you are in denial.

   Then there are the civilian wives that make comments to you such as "you should have known what you were getting into." How many of you honestly knew what you'd be getting into? With all the curve balls the military throws, I don't know that anyone can say they knew 100% what they were getting into! Some of the people making comments like this are more out of ignorance and youth than to inflict hurt on you. Try to be nice to them and just let them know that not everything in life can be planned out 100% of the time. While you can't change the situation, you do the best you can given what you have to work with.

   I hope the next time one of the civilian wives makes a comment about being away from loved ones you'll take a step back, resist the urge to punch her in the face and just try to remember we're all on the same side.

Love and War and Pre-Deployment

  Deployments are a time when emotions are running high. No matter what branch your spouse is in it's always the same. Your husband comes home, looks at you and says, "I'm deploying." At first you are sad; sad that he's going to be gone, sad you won't get to see him, sad that he'll miss ___________ (fill in holidays, birthdays, anniversary, births here). Then you are terrified of the possibilities deployments bring. Then you are happy knowing that you have the power to watch the Bachelor or Grey's Anatomy or any other show without hearing, "Do we REALLY have to watch this crap?" for the next xxx months. You'll have about 15 other emotions as well and it's all in the span of 60 seconds.

  For those of you who have been through a deployment already you know exactly what I am talking about. For those who have yet to have their 1st deployment under their belt, you'll learn quickly what I'm talking about! Then comes the work-ups. All the field exercises they do before they go, all the late nights he's at work and ALL the gear they bring home. It's amazing how much there is to pack...and then re-pack...and re-pack until it all fits. Then there is the fighting. Yes, it is a universal thing. No, you are not the only one who is fighting with your spouse. It is totally normal. It doesn't matter if you are Army, Navy, Air Force or Marine Corps. It's a stressful time and it's easier to say goodbye when you're huffy and distant. For you ladies who are going through this for the first time, don't worry about it. It's not the end of your marriage and you're not going to get a divorce because you're fighting before he leaves. As for going to bed mad...do it! Get some sleep and talk about it in the morning.